Loneliness: The Secret to Success in the Modern Age

It is so nice to have no friends. I look around and see people taking and laughing with their comrades, and I mentally pat myself on the back. As long as I keep everyone at arm’s length, I will be blissfully happy.

For one thing, without friends I have more time to accomplish my goals. With no friends to call, text, facebook me or want me to go out, I get all my homework done so efficiently, I can take on much more. If I had not discovered this ground-breaking idea, I never would have been able to garner so many accomplishments. Without friends, goals such as honours classes, scholarships, and a prestigious university are easily within my grasp. I’ve heard some quasi-intellectuals spout that I need friendships in order to be a well-rounded individual; however I must disagree. I’m the most well-rounded individual I know. In fact, without friends, I have more time to cultivate the different areas of my life. I can practice sports for hours with no one tempting me to do something less productive. I am able to expose myself to different types of music by keeping my ear buds in at all times—made possible because no one is vying for my attention. I can practice, research and hone all my skills without interruption.

This genius life principle transcends the high school years. I can practice it for the rest of my life, most notably when it comes to marriage. For one thing, I am whole as an individual—it is almost laughable to think that a relationship, a union of souls, is the thing that will complete me. On some levels, it may even be insulting. As a woman, I can do everything a man can, so I certainly don’t want one to burden me. I don’t need someone making exorbitant demands on my time and energy. In reality, relationships are the most selfish things on earth. Relationships involve constantly demanding that other person to give of himself in order to suit my needs and desires. To be alone and not putting such demands on anyone is the most noble thing I can do. Need I mention Mother Theresa? Also, with marriage there is the ridiculous pressure from society to have children. I agree that it is our prerogative to populate the earth. However, I feel we can leave that job to the third world countries: they are accomplishing it admirably without our help. It is far more important to focus on my career, than to waste my time raising children. As people of the 21st century, we cannot (dare I say, should not?) keep conforming to archaic values. Those values which have carried our world thus far obviously lost their value once we entered the modern age.

It is plain to see that excess interaction with the people around me is, in fact, detrimental to my future. To be ahead of the game, I must cut off those who would want to distract me from what really matters in life. This is the true secret to success.